Hooters & Hula Hooping
Sorry I haven’t posted sooner, this month has been a little crazy with the semester ending, all the papers to write and finals to study for, my brain had to decompress for a minute. I had such a great time on my last date! I went out with Samantha, she is the last of my SNT group members, who I met at Towson University, to go on a date with me (and she just graduated!!!!! Congratulations!!!!).
In our SNT groups we had to set a goal for ourselves (mine ended up being this blog). We are all so proud of Sam for completing her goal, which was to get a job after graduation, yeah!!! Go Sam!!! When one of us completes a goal it is a win for us all (say what you want b/c haters gonna hate)! I really do feel like that because without my SNT girls (Sam, Sarah, Allison & Kelly) I wouldn’t have started my blog. Everything I did when starting my blog went wrong but these wonderful ladies kept my spirits up and my hopes high, so thank you all. I feel very lucky to have gotten “stuck” with such a caring (pushy…that might be me), spirited (out spoken), funny (smart assed), and amazing group of women! I wouldn’t change it for the world.
Sam and I were supposed to be dancing in the rain but the day we go on our date mother nature told us to fuck off (excuse my France) and let the sunshine all day (oh Maryland weather). Not to worry, I had a backup! Sam and I were going to Hooters for lunch as part of our date and I thought well what if we get the Hooters girls to dance with us? Great right! Turns out when we walked into the restaurant, this Hooters had hula hoops and jump ropes….why? In case of boredom... YES! If you (whoever you are, out there reading this… since I don’t get a lot of comments I assume you’re there) haven’t figured it out by now I love to “stir the pot” as my mom likes to say. Hence, with most certainty had decided that Sam and I needed to hula hoop!
Sam and I talked a lot about ‘dating’ on our date. I’m sure most of you are very familiar with dating. Well I suck at it! I am awkward, uncomfortable, nervous, and I overthink things (…god damn woman stereotype). So for everyone who has ever said the wrong thing, laughed at the wrong time, been over dressed (or under dressed) for a date, or maybe couldn’t shut up (or didn’t speak enough) on a date….among so many other things….know you are not alone. Sam and I were talking about dating because it is recent thing for me (obviously that is why I had this date box b/c the end of a 3 year relationship I didn’t see coming) again and she hasn’t…... ever dated (I know culture shock, just take it in). I really admire Sam. I don’t know if it is a generation difference or things that have happened in her life, but for her it was just never a question, her career is and has been the most important thing to her (she so determined). I thought I was determined but Sam has got me beat (she is gonna go places).
This was one of the dates with a question! The question Sam selected was (the hardest of them all if you ask me): If you had to listen to the same five musical artist for a month who would choose? Why them? Sam said she would choose Guns and Roses, Lana Del Ray, Adele, Carrie Underwood, and Pat Benatar. She picked these artists for many different reasons, Adele is her favorite singer of all time. Sam said, “I wanna be Adele when I grow up!” While Carrie is her favorite artist to sing of all time and Pat is her mom’s favorite all time singer. So every time she listens to her it reminds her of dancing and singing in the kitchen with her mom. Lana made it into the top 5 because of her voice, musicality, and the stories behind her lyrics (it really is amazing to listen to her sing…not to mention her crazy nails). GnR claimed the top spot because in Sam’s eyes the original members are “the baddest Mother fuckers that ever lived” (lol, I was laughing so hard. I mean they are great but her conviction was fantastic!). Sweet Child O’ mine is her favorite song and the 1st song she ever recognized on the radio (epic parent win btw). The 5 Artists I would listen to on repeat for a month would be Billy Joel, Pantera, Frank Sinatra , Etta James, and Pearl Jam (maybe the Deftones instead of P.J it would depend on... well lets go with the activities going on that month). I’m not going to go into why those Artists for me because that could take a page or two… I’ll just say I like a little of everything and need variety (It was so hard to pick 5 but I love my picks, 10 would have been a little easier).
You really want to know why I think dating is hard: Texting (nobody calls anybody anymore and letters are a thing of the past), people don’t communicate in general & when they do it is small talk (I hate small talk. I want to talk about the meaning of life, politics, sex, religion, intellect, music that makes you feel things, your memories, lies you’ve told, your hopes & dreams, your childhood, what keeps you up at night…not what’s up), and romance….ha (the best you will get is out to dinner or a movie. Prince charming isn’t real FYI save yourself). There are a few types of people that are dating at my age: the divorced ones (really unhappy, a cheater, or no time for anything but themselves), the ones with a check list (an idealist or an over- thinker….depends on the type person but both are their own brand of special… I definitely have a checklist: keeps it real, makes me laugh & gets my humor, good morals, responsible, likes some of the same things I do (music/movies/activities)…what about the biggest one if they like kids, well more like it my son likes them), the flirts (just trying to get laid or teasing), the young at heart (immature), the overworked (career driven), the parents (family driven) and relationship club holders (they are in love with love or don’t like being single). Majority of people will fall into one or more of these categories but no matter which one you are, dating is hard (and putting yourself out there is even harder). I have an easier time getting a real person on the phone for customer support, then dating.
While at Hooters, Sam and I had a super awesome waitress named Gabby, who also attends Towson (Go Tigers!). After Sam and I ate we decided to explain to Gabby about my blog and how we were supposed to dance in the rain but it wasn’t raining. Gabby thought my blog sounded really fun and said she would love to help out when I asked if we could hula hoop in the restaurant. Now you can only imagine some of the crazy looks we got when we started hula hooping (they were like… bitches be crazy), because I suck and I mean absolutely am the worst at hula hooping but we needed an activity. I thought it was hysterical. Gabby (bless her heart), tried to show me how to move my feet so the hoop wouldn’t fall but it didn’t work (I have such a flat ass, I was doomed). Sam was getting it…. Well at least for a few times a round (lol).
Have I mentioned that I hate it when my dad is right? Well I realize just how important it is to write things down… (Damn it he was right). Insert Dad speech (lecture) here, about that time when, he told me to write down my goals or they are not real and will not get accomplished (seriously I can hear his chuckle in my mind right now…it kinda makes me wanna scream). I realized it because that is how we started off our SNT groups by writing down our goals. GOAL ACCOMPLISHED! What does this have to do with my date with Sam or dating? Well it just made me realize that I’ve been so scatter brained lately and the only way to fix it is to set that goal and ask yourself: “So? What do you want?” Now it’s time to set a new goal. My life isn’t a movie, fairy tale, or soap opera, it is just an average day to day life… but it’s mine and I love it. My goal for the summer is to not overthink everything (or everyone) and just find my happiness.
This is like a 2nd chance summer for me… remember I’m 29 years old with a 10 year old, I’m living with my parents so I can finish college and I’m going to graduate next May. This summer I was lucky enough to get an internship, but even with that I have so many opportunities most single mothers could never dream of having like being able to kayaking, camping, disc golfing, play baseball, go to game night, hanging out with my friends, go fishing, and anything else my mind can think of because my son is old enough to do them with me and my awesome parents babysit my son to give me some grown up time (and he loves spending time with them)! When May 2017 comes along and I graduate and I go to get a career in the field I desire, we will move and things will change… (at least I hope to god they will be or the last 3 years have been for nothing). Next summer won’t be like this one, so I need to appreciate this summer and not overthink it and just relax, how hard could that be?
So what have we learned…
1. Sometimes you have to roll with the punches because you can’t control everything (especially the weather).
2. Being eclectic is essential to being Awesome (well-being me…lol)! J/k I'm sure you are all awesome even if you listen to horrible music.
3. Add hula hooping with a hooters girl to your bucket list (Gabby @ the Towson Hooters is Awesome) you won't be disappointed!
4. Appreciate the time that you have because it will be gone before you know it.
5. DATING is hilarious, awkward, fun, annoying, & fantastic all at the same time so give yourself a break. How are you going to figure it out without making mistakes? Remember it’s the lessons you take away from the heartbreak that make you learn. You will figure out what you want along the way (but you aren’t going to find it, if you don’t put yourself out there).
